So. There's these people. Who are awesome, and dear to me, as many people are. And they're doing a THING, as most people do at one point or another. But see, the thing is, the thing they're doing.... it's AWESOME, because they sing awesomely and write funny and awesome and amazing and cover even better, and I want them to get the money they need so I can have it and it can be ALL MINE.

So having just started working a couple months ago, I lack the ability to just HAND OVER the $5000 they need, and am instead left appealing to ya'll for help with the shillings. Or really, USD would be more helpful.


Here's an example of their awesome (and it's even more awesome if you're an Avenger's fan (I hope I got the fandom right)).

And if you like that, then here's where you go to give them the monies. Or, you know, just if you like me you go there and give them some monies. =)

But not for me!

It's time for the annual Walk For Change! (You know, by ending sexual violence). Which means it's the time when I ask all you nice folks to sponsor me and support the Boston Area Rape Crisis Center.  Because, you know, it's an awesome organization. And I love the work we do. And I love even more that we try so hard to do it right, and so often we get it right, and people need that.

And here's the thing. IT TAKES MONEY TO DO THE WORK WE DO.  It takes money to pay the staff, and rent the building, and pay the answering service for making sure all our calls get through, and pay for cabs so our medical advocates can get to hospitals after the MBTA stops running, and for supplies for our Community Awareness and Prevention Services group to have papers to hand out and other things they need, and to run 40 hour trainings so we can always have volunteers, and to go to conferences so our staff can learn more and teach others and all the things we do.

And so if you can, and would be so kind, I would love for you to help me out. Help me keep taking calls. Sponsor me, and donate to BARCC, at my Walk for Change site: http://barcc.donorpages.com/WalkforChange2014/ShoshanaEffron/

And if you can't donate, that's okay too. You can still support me, and be there for me to vent at, or cry at, or be happy at. Or just offer hugs. Anything at all =)

I am dubious that people read me, but assuming they do:

I can nominate things for Hugo awards.  Really.  I want to do this. However, in particular, I want to nominate things that are not the standard white guy writings. (I'm not entirely sure how I feel about the white gal writings.)

Short stories are ideal, particularly if I can access them online.Works by persons of color are also ideal.  Works by persons of color that are not western-centric are even better. Works that are not western centric, even if they are by white people, are also in my things I WANT to read list.

Please, offer me suggestions.

(And if you happen to be one of my writer friends, please remind me of any eligible works you have. I make no promises about nominating, but at least it will get me to read them.)

So I have a group project for my research class. We're trying to get 200 completed responses to this survey we're doing.

It's online, it takes less than 10 minutes.

We're gathering FAKE data. Which means: we need you to pretend to be someone else, and to answer all the questions as if you were this other person.

Here's who you are:

NOT in marketing/PR/advertising or transportation. (First question: pick education or construction or none of the above.)
You are between the ages of 21-34.
You own a car/truck/SUV (and you drive it).
You go to bars at least a few times a month. (The question that asks that: pick a few times a month, a few times a week, or every day.)
On a typical evening out, you'll have at least three drinks. (Pick 3, 4, 5, or more than 5 on that question.)
And you are generally excited about buying new products and services. (PICK THAT ANSWER).


After that, read and answer the questions.  Yes, we know the last question has a problem. Pick an answer anyway. We apologize for the problem.

Here's the link. Please help us out with this!  Thanks.

Edited to add: It's for my intro to research class at Emerson, and because this way we can do whatever we want for the project and still get responses without having to figure out a thing that matches the population of Emerson and without recruiting real world people, which is hard, especially in one week.  The prof just wants us to get experience with writing the survey and analyzing the results.

I have a bed, and a laptop, and a pile of fuzzy blankets, and I'm not moving until the world gets better. Or it's Saturday and the Swabian Peasants need things sold in their yards.

And also because I'm in some degree of trying to control shock response:

I did not leave the house today. School is 6 +/- 3 blocks from where it happened (the crime scene ends 3 blocks from school, the center is ~6 blocks away from school).  Thus school, where I was not, is on lockdown. Until 7am, they say. I'd not be surprised if there's increased security for longer. It's closed tomorrow, to have a day of rest and healing. We'll see if there's more than that.

Honestly, I feel really bad for the counselors who have to be there to counsel traumatized people, who are probably also similarly traumatized. Being trained to counsel re:trauma does not mean you don't experience it yourself.

 

I am ok. was not at the Marathon.  School is relatively near Copley and is in lockdown, but that's all I know. AFAIK, it's far enough away that it should be ok.

So I know many of you already gave, and I thank you very muchly.

Today starts my week of ALL THE BARCC THINGS, culminating with the Walk for Change.

Here are the AWESOME things that BARCC does, that they can't do without your support:

1) The Clothesline Project in South Station
      BARCC puts up two pretty full lines of t-shirts made by survivors, significant others, friends, family - ANYONE impacted by sexual violence. The t-shirts are powerful. Some are stories of what happened. Some are how people responded. Some are messages of hope and healing. All of them open conversations for the people who walk by.  This is happening tomorrow at the South Station Atrium from way too early in the morning until 7ish in the evening. I'll be there from 9 am - 12am. (Come say hi!)

2) We have 7 survivor speaking events this month (at least one of which I'm at).  That's about 14 survivors, telling their stories, and educating people about all the different forms sexual assault can take, and the impact it has on survivors, family, friends, and communities.

3) We have 24/7 toll-free hotline coverage, meaning we can take calls from anyone, in any language, at any time of day or night.  We help survivors through rough spots, even decades after the assault.  We help family, friends, significant others, providers, and community members understand survivors of sexual assault, understand their own reactions, and be supportive while still getting the support they need.

4) We have 24/7 medical advocacy service, meaning that at any time of day or night, one of our medical advocates can meet a survivor at the hospital and be there while the evidence collection kit is collected. The medical advocate makes sure the kit is done as well as possible, that the survivor feels comfortable saying no to any part of the procedure, and also helps family or friends of survivors who are at the hospital, if they can.

5) We have some number of community awareness and prevention services programs going on this month, as well as our standard counseling (individual AND group), case management, and legal advocacy programs.

All of these programs are FREE. We charge NOTHING for people to see the clothesline, hear our survivors speak, talk to someone on the hotline at ANY hour of the day, have someone accompany them at the hospital even in the dead of night, or get counseling services and help with school/housing/work/whatever and hear about legal options.

To those of you who have already donated (time, money, positive feelings), THANK YOU. I cannot thank you enough.

To those of you who were thinking about it but put the decision off, we're closing in on that deadline.  The link to sponsor me is here.  There are other members of my Walk team who have yet to meet their goal, so if you are less particular about who you sponsor, please think about sponsoring one of them: Alex Phillips, Ashley Brown, Benazeer Noorani, and Lisa Smith.

(If you don't feel comfortable donating online, feel free to contact me personally and we can find a way that works best for you.)

MCA Hogarth wrote a book, Spots the Space Marine.  Games Workshop claims that they have trademarked the term, and have sent a cease and desist letter to Amazon, who has stopped sale of the books.  Hogarth's space marine is EXACTLY that: a marine in space. The term has been around in SF writing since 1932, and is used by Heinlein and lots of others.  

She's not sure what her next step is, but as a lot of you are writers and SF fans, this affects you, and right now we're just trying to spread the word and publicize it, and maybe see what comes of it. If you're on twitter, there's now a hashtag: #savespacemarines

And here's the link to her most recent write up, which links to the prior information as well. 

So I was talking to someone, and I've been listening to Sassafras's Somebody Will on repeat, and I know it's about space exploration and such, but I kinda want it filked to talk about cultural change, and getting rid of rape culture and making an inclusive culture that appreciates and encourages diversity.

Because dammit, "I am willing to sacrifice something I don't have for something I won't have so somebody will someday", and I know so many others who are, and do, and mrrr.

Anyone who writes songs/filks willing to see if we can do this?

This post is my attempt to frame rape culture in a way that makes it clear and understandable, since I've encountered too many posts talking about sexism or transphobia or racism and how they relate to rape culture where people just don't get the connection. 

Rape culture is the social norms and attitudes that allow the vast majority of rapes and sexual assaults to go unreported, that allow rapists to face little to no punishment for their crimes, that believes that rape, if it happens at all, happens only once. Rape culture, when it is spoken of, is really talking about the pillars that support those beliefs and the silencing of victims/survivors. 

It includes, but is not limited to, sexism, racism, trans- and homo-phobia. It includes anything that makes one group able to ignore the HUMAN-NESS or PERSON-NESS of another. It includes anything that objectifies, sexualizes, or otherwise implies that a person does not have worth as an autonomous being. It includes anything that implies that what a person wears, how a person walks, what a person chooses to ingest, or where a person chooses to go is a reason to be assaulted. It includes anything that minimizes a rapist's responsibility for their actions, anything that denies what the survivor said, anything that makes it harder for someone to come forward. It is the social norms that allow rapists to stay in communities and not be ostracized, even if the whole community knows that person is a rapist. 

Those are the pillars of rape culture. They are found in video games, movies, advertisements, books, the media.... practically anywhere you look.  Those are the things that make survivors reluctant to come forward, reluctant to make accusations, and feel guilt over things that are CLEARLY not their fault. I've spoken to survivors who were DRUGGED who were telling me the whole thing was their fault because of the clothes they wore or the party they went to. The culture that ALLOWS that, that FOSTERS that? That's rape culture, right there. 

My Google Reader is probably the best thing I've encountered for me remembering to keep track of blogs and bloggers I like and enjoy. It's gone through multiple stages of adding and culling, and I'm pretty happy with the current mix. 

So, today, from my reader, comes the links to two posts that I think everyone should see. 

Post the first comes to you from the awesome sex/relationship blogger Emily Nagoski. It's about a composter. No, really. It's also about relationships. Go read it.

Post the second comes to you from the awesome Maymay, and is overlaid with ALL KINDS of trigger warnings. Namely: rape culture. Stupid companies using date rape to sell their product. Unethical companies stealing images meant to fight good causes and using them to sell their product. And there, now I've told you the entire post. But I highly suggest (for those of you who are in a place to deal with this) that you go look, and do something about it. Trigger warning: rape culture/date rape

 shadesong posted something that I feel very strongly connected to. This post, to be exact. She does not want you taking pictures of her.

I do not want pictures taken of me. EVER. I also do not want to take pictures of you, EVER. I want pictures to not exist in my paradigm. Except maybe of knitting. But really, if it meant cameras were not a part of my world, I wouldn't even want pictures of knitting.

Do not tag me in pictures. Do not expect me to be in group pictures. Do not expect me to be in FRONT in group pictures. Do not expect me to be ok with pictures. 

DO NOT EXPECT ME TO EXPLAIN WHY. The reason WHY is that I DO NOT WANT TO. Period. That's the end of it. I DO NOT WANT. 

Unlike 'Song, I'm unlikely to ask you to take down something of me. But I am going to untag myself. I don't have the courage or the willpower to ask you to take it down. So please respect me, and don't put it up in the first place. 

 So while my own readership is probably tiny, I'm hoping to reach out to the bigger social network that ya'll are connected to. I want to go out for the evening in black tie. My potential date for this affair will only feel comfortable if we find somewhere that is usually dressy enough for us not to stand out being dressed fancily there. Anyone know anywhere we could do that? Asking around is an ok way of finding things!!!

Thanks in advance!

 Saturday morning plans did not go as planned (when do they ever, at a con?). There was going to be an attempt to walk the labrynth, which neither the boy nor I woke up for. There was going to be a 10am blood draw, which was delayed upon finding out that YES I HAVE GAINED WEIGHT, and therefore one of my corsets needs longer strings. The irony of this will show up in a moment.

( Saturday. Yes, tis long.Collapse )

Arisia this year started a bit before Arisia started.

Thursday, I got let go from the job I had. (Not a big deal, Friday was my last day anyway and they gave me the full 8 hours pay anyway.) Which meant, Arisia was no longer a !OH WOW I HAVE SOMETHING DIFFERENT AFTER WORK!, it was a "OOOO the boy and I can go together and everything!!!!! And I can see the first panel!!!!!" The boy stayed over Thursday night, and then there was Friday.

Friday morning was spent sleeping in, followed by what felt like frantic packing. Then lunch, then getting the boy a hat and gloves, and then heading to the T. We decided that I should carry the drum so it doesn't get wet. At the hotel, there was room getting, and then registering, and then figuring out what to do. Some measure of seeing people as they came in and running around figuring out the hotel also happened.

( And apparently Friday evening was very longCollapse )

I don't know if you're familiar with this site or not, or if I'm just being silly, but I thought it might interest you. Reconstructing history and then there's this sub page on sewing stuff that you probably already know about but I figured I'd show you anyway.

Also, re:lunch. Apparently not this week. Maybe next? Or on the weekend?

As many of you know, I meandered off to Origins the gaming convention in Ohio a few weeks ago. Partly because it's a life-update that might be fun, and partly because I think I ought to keep track of these things, this is my con writeup.

The drive to Origins on Wednesday went smoothly. Apparently Nathan is smart, because we took I-80 and didn't get caught in all the backup that apparently was I-70. We got there about an hour before Nathan's shift started, Nathan checked into the hotel, and I lost my phone in the car parking it, managed to get Chris and Erik their bags and find my phone. I then headed to the Lab to check in, even though I didn't have anything to do in particular that evening.

The Lab, for those of you unfamiliar, is the reason I was at Origins. Looney Labs, the makers of Fluxx and all its variations, as well as Aquarius, Pyramid (or Icehouse) games, Chrononauts, Are you A Werewolf?, and a couple other fun games, hold the Big Experiment at Origins. The Looneys themselves are awesome people, and their games are so much fun that I spent most of 5 days playing them and still want to teach people. (If you don't know the games and want to learn, let me know! Granted, I only can teach some of them, since the card games require decks that mostly I don't have, but I'd be happy to teach you many of the pyramid games and Fluxx.)

Checking in was fun. I had been at Origins in 2009 for a few days, mostly to visit Nathan there, but while there I met many awesome people. Checking in, I got to reconnect with many of them, and this year I got a Lab Coat. Lab Coats are exciting, in my opinion, because they are really warm, and they say "I can teach Looney games!" So I checked in, and hung around the Lab getting oriented and settled in until Nathan got there for his shift. Nathan had the "I'm responsible" shift, so he gave me the room key and then went to work getting things set up and taking care of things. I wandered off to unload the car and see the room. Room was boring (standard hotel one, you know), so I headed back to the lab. There was a boy there who looked a bit lost and wanted someone to play a multi-player game with him, but there weren't enough of us, so I asked if he wanted to learn a different game with me. We proceeded to learn Martian Coasters and have another person join us.

I continued to hang around the Lab and play games until the end of Nathan's shift, when we went out and got dinner at a bar across the street with Tim and Eeyore and Chris. They were already there, and hadn't know that I would be joining them, so for a while we squished 5 to a 4 person booth. Nathan managed to knock over my water, except I caught it, giving him a face full of water but retaining about half of it in the glass. I considered this a win. Other than it taking FAR too long to get to us and the interesting near-bar-fight incident, dinner was good, and then it was around midnight and Nathan and I went back to the room. I think we went to sleep fairly quickly.

Thursday I woke up around 8 or so, I think, and went down to the lab. I spent the day around the lab volunteering, mostly doing random demos. There was lunch at North Market with Nathan, and then I wandered around the con, seeing what was there.

For those of you who go to Arisia, Origins is a very different convention. Origins is heavily focused on game sellers selling their products, and collecting money from the people who show up for the con. So there are no places where you can really play games for free, or do anything else the con is set up to show off. Even the LARPs and RPGs take money.  Looney Labs is one of the few places that bends the rules a bit and lets you play their games for free, at least for a little while.

That explained, I didn't find anything else that looked appealing enough to spend money on, so I went back to the Lab until my shift in the Booth (where they sell the games). My shift was at the end of the first day, which apparently meant that it was one of the few shifts that was slow and didn't have a demo going all the time there.

Afterward, I went back to the lab, and hung around until after Nathan's shift when he and I got dinner. We got take out from a different bar than the night before, as there aren't a whole lot of places open late, and finding me food is mildly problematic. But what we found was yummy, and we ate it in the Lab, and then hung out in the Lab until closing.  We made it up to the room and to bed around 1am.

Around 3:30, I had woken up and realized I wasn't going to be able to go back to sleep, so I got up to wander the halls. I ended up meeting some of the staff, one of whom was totally flirting with me. Males are funny like that. I ended up talking with them until around 7:30, when I went back to the room to get changed for the Lab.

The Lab opened sometime after 9. It was supposed to open at 9, but since when does anything ever happen in a timely manner? I had a demo shift at 113:00, for a game with the big pyramid blocks. I was nervous about it, as the game is not my favourite, I had little sleep, and was still a bit fuzzy on the rules of the game. But I was in the lab, and had plenty of time to hang out and have fun and then get lunch. Except I got pulled into games. Fun ones, but long ones. And so lunch time came, and went, and Nathan said he was going for lunch, did I want to come? At that point, I had only half an hour until my shift, so I asked him to grab me something I could eat cold after my shift. (He wasn't so good on that point, as he brought back hot pasta for me to eat *then*, not understanding that I had a shift to run for two hours. But the food was still edibly good cold, so he is forgiven.)

No one showed up to play the game I was running. A little kid showed up for a demo, and so I got asked to teach the little kid a simple game. Now, I dislike little kids, and tree-house is not a game I particularly like. Add in that I was still trying to keep an eye out for anyone wanting to play the game I was supposed to be running, and I was not doing oh so very well. And then I got asked to demo a more complicated game for an adult, and the little kid started to throw a fit, and another little kid needed a demo, and there were lost people at the front of the lab, and were any of them there for the game I was supposed to be demoing?  I had a crazy two hours, it felt like, especially as I was working off of very little sleep and no food. When my shift ended and the games were all at a point where I could claim "done", I turned in my paperwork and retreated to get food and rest in the less-than-an-hour I had until I needed to be on duty for the Monty Python Fluxx tournament.

I was only helping with the tournament, and while set-up was crazy, everything after set-up went smoothly, and I even got a break and a chance to play Volcano during the finals. Which was good. But I was still worn out after that.

So after my shift I went out, and found a quiet place in the hall to sit and relax. I had a couple kids come over and pester me; one of whom I had met in the Lab and played games with, and the other who was bored while waiting for her father to be done with his stuff. I would have preferred them not being there, but they weren't screaming, so all-in-all it was ok. And then Nathan and I went to dinner at the barbecue place that is really yummy, with a couple other people. Upon returning to the con, I ran into the guy from the night before, and he and a friend of his and I went to watch some geeky movies. One of them is (I'm told) very like Clerks, and the other is a documentary.

I ran into a couple of people I knew from last year at the movie, so we chatted, and then I found the guy from the other night, who had gone on duty before the end of the second movie. I spent the night wandering around with him again. We talked religion and relationships and life and fun things. At one point, we were talking to a third person in the hall when one of the other Lab people walked by and flirtatiously tried (and failed!) to steal me off. Teasing me about the flirtatious nature of the attempted kidnapping ensued. I went back to my room around 7:30 again, and since I had nothing to do on Saturday, slept in until I felt like waking up. I think this was the only morning Nathan was out of the room before me.

Saturday I spent wandering around the con and the Lab. After the rough day I had Friday, I eschewed the lab coat and went around in shawls. It was nice to just be me, but I wish there was more to do at the con that either felt worth the money or was free. I mentioned the teasing to the guy from the Lab, mostly because I'm oblivious and he flirts with everyone pretty much and so I assumed it was just friendlyness and I had been amused by the not-quite-possessive nature of the teasing. I purchased some really cool decision making dice from the company that makes the most random dice (there's science behind it, and it's awesome). I found the guy from the other night again, and ended up going with him and some of his friends to dinner at the barbecue place again. I dragged him back to the Lab and taught him Volcano. In the midst of teaching him Volcano, there was a... I want to call it a territorial interaction between the Lab guy and the security guy. It was really cute. I had a shift again on Sunday and had to drive home afterward, so I said good night to security guy relatively early. I ended up in the lab for longer than I intended to be since Lab guy and I got involved in a conversation about relationships, until the conversation got interrupted by a demo of a test-prototype game for the Lab people. Then off to sleep, so I could drive home later.

Sunday was relatively quiet. I had my shift, the guy who had been flirting with me showed up and played some of the games I was demoing, and then he and I went off so I could scarf down some food before he had to leave. Then he left, and I went back to the Lab to help pack up. Then the wrap up meeting for Lab volunteers, being told "I like you" ambiguously by Lab guy, and the drive home.

Somewhere in the drive home, I zoned out and lost a car mirror, but Nathan and I (and the rest of the car) were unhurt, so all will be well once that gets fixed on Monday. And that was Origins. I definitely prefer the overall con that is Arisia, but love the Lab and the games enough to go back again next year.

College, being the wonderful place that it was, had a program called Body Politik. The point of the program was to get people thinking about how they relate to their bodies, how society relates to their body, and what could/could not be done about it.  I'm turning this into a meme. And because I think it so important to talk about and think about, I'm not meme-filtering it. Deal with it.

So here's how this works: There are 7 questions. Because of the personal nature of the discussion, pick three. Answer them in as much or as little depth as you want. One of the interesting things about this project was that you could answer in any print media you wanted: prose, poetry, pictures, whatever. Keep that a part of this, if you'd like. (Feel free to answer more.) Tag others to answer them; I'll go with at least 3.


I'm tagging aquila_dominus , cluegirl , kihou , mijan , and usernamenumber . (I didn't tag any of you college folk, because I assume you could have done this had you wanted to. Feel free to tag yourselves if you want the distraction. That goes for other people who I didn't tag as well. I'm still interested in your answers, even if I didn't tag you.)

Body Politik.

1.    What part of your body do you most identify with?    
2.    Do you feel your body/part of your body is politicized?
    3.    How do you ornament your body?
    4.    What part of your body do you cover?
    5.    What part of your body is the most overtly sexualized?
    6.      What do you think of visual displays of the body?
    7.    Do you feel that your body is powerful?
( My answersCollapse )


Interpret the questions how you will; one of the neat things about the program was not only the answers to the questions, but how people interpreted the questions differently from each other.

I'm setting up filters. The way this works:

Friends filter: Most everything here is friends-locked to start with. My life and thoughts are mine, and I choose to share them with a limited audience. If you're not on my friends list and think you should be, reply to this post and say why you think you should be (normally this will be how I know you, but I allow for creativity).

To see other filters, you must be my friend.

Comments are screened.

Tagged -- Tagged, I say! -- by cluegirl  for the Seven Quirks meme.

A. List seven habits/quirks/facts about yourself.
B. Tag seven people to do the same.
C. Do not tag the person who tagged you or say that you tag "whoever wants to do it."

( Because Clue wants to know...Collapse )

Sharing the tag-love as a way to find out about people, and to help with procrastination (bad me, I know). winterlime , aquila_dominus , jzmercury , l33tminion , usernamenumber , kihou , subieko , and anyone else who feels like it.

This entry is open, and is one of the few that is. Please be respectful of that.

Arisia post

( FridayCollapse )
( SaturdayCollapse )

( SundayCollapse )

( MondayCollapse )

All in all, good con.

Edited 1/20 to be able to count, and spell.

In memory of family and friends who have lost the battle with cancer; and in support of the ones who continue to conquer it! Re-post this in your LiveJournal if you know someone who has, had or has been affected by cancer.

via breakinglight11

Body Politik. Thinking about. Should answer.

1.    What part of your body do you most identify with?    
2.    Do you feel your body/part of your body is politicized?
    3.    How do you ornament your body?
    4.    What part of your body do you cover?
    5.    What part of your body is the most overtly sexualized?
    6.      What do you think of visual displays of the body?
    7.    Do you feel that your body is powerful?

Flaming angels walking through my nightmares. I'm behind schedule, again. Still. And summer plans are falling through, if they ever existed.

The direction and the bird are flying away soon. That leaves the tree and the beast, both of whom will end up en mass in seattle. They keep finding the en mass, and I keep finding myself alone.

The roommate is involved with magic groups. I wonder if they know seattle or not. I'm don't trust their magery, and for some reason doubt they know about seattle.

All this is connected to the flaming angels wandering around my nightmares.  One of these days I'll meet someone who won't be there, who will be here. I can't be the only one. I'm part of salvage, not defense.  Not sure why, has something to do with languages. And communication.  And the dreamemories I had about being fluent in all speaks, was a precursor.  I doubt the reality will be anything like that, but the communication will be what salvages humanity, if anything can.

So now to learn everything I can about it, and go from there.  Somehow grad school's on the plan, but I can't tell my parents I need to go to grad school for linguistics/psychology/communication because I'm going to need it when the apocalypse happens. Or is over.

And to find out which angel is burning, and why he's connected to me, now.  Only wish I knew how.